I used to live in my head. I was full of regrets and blaming others for where I was in my life. If so-and-so hadn’t done this thing to me, then I would not be here in this mess now.
I was literally STUCK for a long time because of dwelling on what happened and what didn’t happen and how I should have done this or done that and because I didn’t now I am at point A when I should be at point E by now.
And then came the fear of the future. I am too old to get to point E. I don’t have the work experience to be at point E. People will judge me for not being at points B, C, D at my age. I’m too broken to handle point E.
On and On this cycle of fear, doubt and regret kept me soooo STUCK for a very long time.. I was miserable (and so was my family) – I felt useless – I felt joyless – I felt life has passed me by.
And then I made the choice to do something before it really was too late and it started with my first Facebook page called, Ethereal Quest. This page is just pretty boxes full of beautiful images and wisdom quotes. It is still active and it’s a very peaceful place to go and browse. There is no selling, no trolls, I rarely share from my business page and I put very little dialog on my posts and shares. I called this page my happy place for a long time. You can check it out if you want.. Ethereal Quest..
Anyway, after a while I was beginning to feel a little more empowered. I had taken a few courses and thought I knew everything… I was a new person!
I decided that the way to deal with my past was to make amends and try to heal those relationships that were so hurtful. I was going to extend the olive branch to family and friends with whom I had broken ties.
I imagined myself a hero, I suppose. I would give a peace offering that would be accepted with love and everyone would see me as this amazingly changed person and they would admit how wrong they were in the past. I am this changed, high vibrating soul and they would be in awe and be sorry for all they had done.
Pshhh… you can just imagine how that all went down.
Let’s see, I hugged my father at a family event and he refused to hug me back… in front of the whole family.
I wrote a letter to an old friend and asked if we could talk. She wrote back and told me she would never forgive me and wanted nothing to do with me… And worst… She didn’t apologize for her behavior!
And another family member blocked me after I sent them a friend request on the Facebook.
Can you imagine my so very good intentions being thrown back in my face like this? I mean, at least I tried. I was the good person in all these scenarios, right? Wasn’t I? Or were my intentions less than honest… did I just want to win the battles… to offer peace by making them surrender? I thought I was extending an olive branch so we could heal… but wasn’t it a trick to get them to apologize for their wrong and make me feel righteous?
Cause see, I still couldn’t get over what they had done! I still was not able to move on without an apology… without my feelings being validated… without being the winner of the war and making them admit to their wrongdoing.
After a couple years of study and self-healing, I WAS STILL STUCK in the same place I had been for years and years – Not being able to move forward because of not letting go of past situations.
It would take a couple more years for me to realize that I was the only one that had the power to heal myself. I was the person who had to forgive me. I was the only person I could change. I was the only one whose heart I had power over. And whatever they were feeling about me – well, that was their burden to bare, not mine.
I want to share with you the biggest tool I have learned for getting out of my head when those thoughts come creeping back in…
It’s called grounding.
This week I am leading a FREE 3 day workshop on the Root Chakra and Grounding in my facebook workshop group. I’d love for you to join me and learn how working with your Root Chakra can be life changing… it was for me.
I also want to offer you this workshop bonus!! It is a free ebook from day 1 of my Introduction to Holistic Healing Course that I held as a workshop last year and will be launched with updates on my academy in just a few months. This ebook is everything we learned on day one of the workshop and has a ton of information about the Root Chakra. To get the book you just need to follow the link below and sign up for my Ethereal Quest Newsletter. I know, I know.. I hate opt-ins! But, I promise that this newsletter is only sent twice per month – once as the newsletter with updates, free offers and schedules – and once as a reminder about the latest workshop. It is nothing but value for you, I promise!!